dear you
Today, i had nothing much to do, but to sulk at home, so i decided to write lucus a letter, i know he won't talk to me, he proberbly won't even read this letter, but anythings worth a try, to get him back.
Dear you,
Why are you doing this to me?
why are you being like this?
I know somewhere in that heart of yours you know, why i broke up with you, you know me so well, my good points, my faults, my weakness's, my strengths, my secrets, yet you still act like you don't know the reason, well you wanna know why? i'll tell ya:
You know what i'm like, i hate it when people think their right and tell me what to do, when i totally don't agree with them.
You know how i can lose my temper at the slightest thing, you know how hurt i get when people tell me i'm wrong, when i know i'm right.
So that day, when you got mad at me, and took Lee's side over mine, you hurt me so much, i don't know what happened to me, a fire burned inside of me, the attention i wanted, you gave it to Lee, and i could'nt take that, i felt hurt, and i wanted to hurt you in the hardest way possible, and the only way to do that was to break up with you, i loved you soo much ( still do) but my pride took and hurt took over, i had to swallow my pain, so i hurt you and it worked.
You were so hurt and mad when i broke up with you.
But now i realise that it was'nt a nice thing to do, revenge is not sweet like they say it is, and by punishing you, i punished myself, why did'nt i just forgive you.
I honestly did'nt mean to hurt you, you know what i'm like i just got carried away.
So now that you know why i broke up with you, do you think you could forgive me?
I need you so, so much right now, i'm honestly nothing without you.
This pain without you hurts me so much, that i would rather prefer death, than to live with this pain.
I sit here typing, but my minds, somewhere else, i wonder where you are right now, i wonder if your out having fun with some next gurl, i wonder if you thought about me at least once after what happened yesterday, i wonder, i wonder.
I'm sorry about eveything that happened yesterday, i must've made you look so low infront of your fellow graduates, i never meant for that to happen, but i don't know, these days i just can't control my self, i feel as if i'm losing it, i don't want to end up like that, i really dont, but i know that if i don't have you in my life, somert will happen.
I know i have no right to be forgiven, but could you find it somewhere in your heart to do so, i know behind all that anger, that sweet, caring, sensitive guy, i know still exists, and i don't know why but my heart tells me you still love me, is that true?
I know it's been some time since we've been apart, you could've moved on, so what i want to know is why did'nt you?
I know this letter must seem so long, and that i keep on babbling on, but i don't know, i just can't find the right words to express myself, it is just so hard to tell you what i'm feeling right now.
But there's one feeling, i'll always be sure of, and that is to love you, shit i miss you soo much.
I hope this letter will make you see things from my point of few, take as much time as you want, but please just talk to me.
Until then, i want you to know, that i miss you and that i love you, even though we were apart all those months, i never once stopped loving you.
Yourstruely4ever
Me.....
i'm gonna go and post this letter tommorrow, i want to give it to him my self, but i know he won't wanna see me.